Every morning, Shrek wakes up and trudges over to his office. It ain't easy being the CEO of an ogreempire. He's got tons of paperwork to chew through, meetings with annoying fairies, and the constant threat of donkey shenanigans.
To top it all off, he's gotta battle the monotony. Sometimes he dreams of just staying in his swamp with a good bowl of swamp stew, but duty calls. He sighs and throws on his fancy pants. Another day, another gold coin.
Swamp Thing Corporate: They Know
Ya'll feel/sense/know it in your bones. The corporate/biz/establishment swamp/quagmire/sludge is real, and it's thick/churning/sticky. Big/The/Shady money calls the shots/controls everything/runs the show, leaving/screwing over/trampling the rest of us. It's a system/machine/structure rigged against the little guy/ordinary people/you and me.
- We're/They're/You're all just stuck/trapped/chained in this mess/circus/nightmare.
- It's/This is/That's time/past time/high time to fight back/break free/make a change.
- Let's/We can/They should drain the swamp/expose the truth/hold them accountable.
Don't/Ever/Never let them tell you/fool you/brainwash you into believing/thinking/accepting that this is just how things are. We deserve/can have/must fight for a better/fairer/just world.
Bayou Living > The Rat Race
Listen here, partner. This ain't your daddy's office job . Out here in the wetlands, life moves at a more natural flow. You get your hands dirty, sure, but you also get to feel the breeze . No deadlines out here. Just the chirping crickets and the soft sunlight. It's a simple life , ya know? One you can't find in no corporate ladder climb.
Farquaad's the Big Cheese Send Help
This is a disaster. Working for him/that little tyrant/the Short King is awful/terrible/a living nightmare. He's always yelling/constantly on my case/demanding impossible things and expects me to be perfect/treat him like royalty/clean his boots. I tried to quit once, and let me tell you, it was a big mistake. Now he's watching me like a hawk/making my life hell/threatening to turn me into an ogre.
I just need someone to save me. Maybe a fairy godmother/a dragon/one of those talking donkeys could help me escape/give me some advice/teach me how to fight Farquaad.
{
* I'm certain he's going to fire me/turn me into a swamp frog/make me his jester.
* I can't take it anymore/stand this/deal with this.
* Please, someone, come quick!
Full Time Ogre, Part Time Meme Lord
He's a real beast, but in the best way possible. This dude lives and breathes that green goodness. When he's not rocking his massive club, you can catch him spreading laughter online. This OGRE has mastered the art of being a funny guy.
- Nobody's funnier than this ogre
- That sweet, sweet internet validation fuels him
- Don't anger the meme lord
Weekend Forecast: 100% Swamped
Well folks, you better grab your boots and mosquito repellent 'cause this weekend is gonna be a real soaker. We're lookin' at swampy rain all the whole darn time with heat indexes in the mid-80s. If you're thinkin' about headin' outdoors, best pack some extra repellent and a raincoat. It might even be good for gettin' that swamp critter watchin' in.